5 Reasons Why Many Are In Unequally Yoked Relationships

There are many reasons why many Christians end up in unequally yoked relationships with unbelievers and this post will discuss 5 of such main reasons why it is so.

If you are a Christian desiring to be in a relationship, the partner you want to be in a relationship must be equally yoked with your faith and Christian values.

With that said, let’s look at the 5 major reasons why many Christians end up in unequally yoked relationships with unbelievers so that you don’t become one of them as well.

5 Reasons For Unequally Yoked Relationships.

Below are the 5 main reasons why unequally yoked relationships exist even among believers with unbelievers when it’s not supposed to be so.

1. Impatience.

The first reason why there are many unequally yoked relationships among dating Christians is many of them are just too impatient to wait upon the Lord for direction.

Rushing things with God when it comes to relationships is just a recipe for disaster. It’s why many Christians especially desperate Christian women are ending up with abusive husbands in abusive marriages.

You need to understand that patience is a vital virtue you need to have as a single Christian if you desire to marry a godly partner or spouse who will be a blessing to you just as you will be with them.

Many due to the fear of dying alone in old age and out of desperation end up rushing to be in a relationship and to get married soon especially if God is delaying their prayer request for a life partner.

Consequently, many end up settling for unbelievers all because they don’t want to die alone but this must not be how you go about relationships as a single Christian.

Learn to be patient and the Lord in due time will bless you with a godly spouse to raise the godly family your heart has always desired since childhood.

2. Lack Of Discernment.

The second reason why many believers end up with unequally yoked relationships with unbelievers is many young single believers simply lack proper discernment when it comes to relationships.

Many due to hormones raging and boiling like acid in their bodies think anyone who looks beautiful or handsome and gives them butterflies in their stomachs is a potential mate to marry when that couldn’t be further from the truth.

As you young maturing adult Christian single lady or single guy, you must remember that just because you have strong feelings for someone doesn’t mean you are in love with them as love is more than that.

Perhaps as a Christian brother, you might be attracted to a certain sister in the Lord you think is beautiful and exquisite in your eyes and mistook that for love. That’s infatuation, dear brother, and don’t act on those feelings.

Similarly, as a sister in the Lord, you may be infatuated by a handsome brother who has money and thinks you are in love with them. Hold your fire, dear sis, and don’t let your hormones mislead you.

Understand that choosing the right person to marry requires proper discernment and God’s guidance many young hormone-raged Christian singles are lacking. Don’t be in such a camp; let God guide you on who to marry.

3. Misunderstanding Of Compatibility.

A misunderstanding of compatibility when it comes to faith and Christian core values can lead many Christians into unequally yoked relationships.

Many people, including Christians, confuse physical attraction and emotional chemistry with long-term compatibility based on shared core values, purpose, and individual temperaments.

While these elements are important, they do not guarantee a sustainable relationship without a shared faith foundation especially if the person you are dating doesn’t share your Christian values on many issues such as family, marriage, or finances.

Compatibility involves aligning Christian core values, life goals, temperament, purpose, and spiritual beliefs as a couple in a relationship intending to marry each other long term.

When these fundamental aspects are overlooked, the relationship may face severe difficulties and even end in a painful breakup due to irreconcilable incompatibilities between the couple.

This is why as a Christian intending to date and find a suitable mate to marry and spend the rest of life with, it’s vital you choose a mate you are compatible with in Christian core values, purpose, and above all temperament.

4. Misinterpretation Of Evangelism.

Another common reason why many Christians end up in unequally yoked relationships is the misinterpretation of evangelism and thinking they can change the person.

Some Christians enter relationships to convert their partner, believing that their godly influence and love will lead to a spiritual transformation or change in the unbeliever.

This approach often stems from a genuine desire and love for the Christian to share their faith with an unbelieving partner but can lead to complications when the partner does not convert.

You need to understand that only God, not you has the capacity to change a person’s heart. It’s not your job to change and fix another person’s character flaws especially if such people don’t want to change their ways.

Never enter a relationship with an unbeliever thinking you can change them when God hasn’t told you so or given you such prerogative right to change someone. Doing so will only land you in trouble or make you end up with an abusive spouse.

5. Cultural And Social Pressures.

Lastly, cultural and social pressures to marry as soon as possible, especially in Asian countries also play a pivotal role in Christians entering unequally yoked relationships.

In many societies, there is a significant emphasis, especially on young girls and young adult women to be in a relationship and get married by a certain age.

This societal pressure can lead individuals to prioritize the status of being in a relationship and marrying as soon as possible over the spiritual compatibility of their partner and whether that partner aligns with God’s will for their lives.

Family expectations and cultural norms often push many Christians towards relationships with people who fit certain criteria, such as financial stability, caste, and social standing, rather than spiritual alignment and God’s purpose.

Moreover, as a Christian, you must not allow cultural and social pressure to force you to be in a relationship you don’t want or be with a partner who’s not God’s will for you all because you want to please your family who won’t live your married life.


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I hope the above 5 reasons why many Christians end up in unequally yoked relationships have helped you understand why many Christians end up with unbelieving spouses.

I hope and pray after reading this, you don’t end up in an unequally yoked relationship with an unbeliever if you desire a godly marriage. Trust God’s timing and don’t rush, please.

In closing, if this post has blessed you, drop a comment below, and don’t forget to share using the right share icon as you leave. God bless and date within your tribe.

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