When Christian friends hurt you, it can be hard to know how to respond. You probably don’t want to just walk away from a Christian friendship that has meant so much to you for so long.
It’s easy to feel like God has abandoned you when you have been hurt by Christian friends when you least expected it to happen. But He hasn’t. He’s still there, and He wants to help you through the pain.
When your Christian friends hurt you, it’s important to understand that your Christian friends just like any other person are not angels and are still fallible humans capable of letting you down.
Secondly, you need to be honest about what happened and how your friend’s words or actions affected you. And if necessary, you can consider walking away from the friendship altogether.
It may seem counterintuitive, but when someone hurts us in a close relationship, it’s an opportunity for growth if we take the time to reflect on what happened and allow God to guide us through this difficult time.
And this article today on when Christian friends hurt you will show you how to let go and forgive the Christian friends who hurt you in one way or the other.
5 Things To Do When Christian Friends Hurt You.
Below are the 5 biblical ways of handling Christian friends who have hurt you in your life to pave a way for reconciliation with them to restore the lost fellowship.
- Pray For Them.
- Practice What You Preach.
- Don’t Seek Revenge.
- Don’t Give Up.
The most logical and godly thing you can do as a Christian who’s been hurt or betrayed by a Christian friend is to forgive them for the wrong they have done to you.
Remember, Jesus Christ tells us in Matthews 6:14, 15 in the New Testament that we need to forgive others including our Christian friends who have hurt us if we want our heavenly Father to forgive us as well.
You need to understand that you as well do many wrong things that hurt God like sinning that is why it doesn’t make sense for you to refuse to grant forgiveness to any Christian friend who may have hurt you in the past.
As we saw in the above verse in 15 of Matthews 6 that if you don’t forgive others who have done you wrong, neither will God forgive you as well.
So, forgiveness is the way to go as a Christian who’s been hurt by a fellow close friend claiming to be a Christian because you are dealing with imperfect and fallible humans whether a Christian friend or not.
2. Pray For Them.
When a friend hurts you, pray for them and ask God to help you forgive them. Pray that they would have eyes to see their sin and repent of it (Proverbs 28:9).
Praying for your Christian friends who have hurt you instead of holding grudges against them is the best thing you can do for yourself and them to hear from the hurt those people have caused you.
You must understand that anyone whether Christian or not can at times do mean things to you when you least expect it because those people, too are not angels but human beings capable of making mistakes.
Many times, we have unrealistic expectations that if someone is a Christian friend, they can’t hurt us or do us wrong but that couldn’t be further from the truth.
There is a good reason why the Lord Jesus Christ told us to love and pray for those who hurt us in Matthews 5:44 as He knew that even within Christian circles, people will at times do mean things to each other.
3. Practice What You Preach.
If you preach that Christians should forgive each other, then practice what you preach by forgiving your friend who hurt you. If you preach that Christians should love one another, then love your friend despite their sins against you (John 13:34-35).
Sadly, many people who claim to be Christians forget to do this important act of practicing what they preach which is why there is so much hostility in the body of Christ and the church today where only love, grace and forgiveness must dwell.
Instead, many supposed Christians practice holding grudges against their fellow Christians who have done them wrong. Such people don’t truly understand what true Christian friendship is all about.
Understand that if you are unable to forgive your friends who have done you wrong as Jesus Christ commands you, then, you are not His true disciple or follower as true followers of Christ Jesus forgive others the way Christ did.
You must know if you claim to be a true Christian who claims to love others, one of the litmus tests that will show that your love is real is how willing you will be able to forgive those who hurt you.
4. Don’t Seek Revenge.
Do not retaliate in kind when hurt by others, but rather pray for them as Psalms 4:4 tell us in the Old Testament that tells us to be patient with everyone and to refrain from anger and turn from wrath, which only leads to evil.
Due to our fallen nature, it’s natural to seek revenge on people who have hurt us or committed an offense against us but that’s not a spirit you must entertain as a Christian.
Instead, as Christians, we are supposed to be tender loving, and kind to everyone including those who have committed an offense against us by showing them grace which is what true Christianity is all about anyway (Ephesians 4:31,32).
However, if you harbor resentment and bitterness towards a friend who has committed an offense against you by seeking revenge instead of showing them grace, it shows that you don’t understand what true friendship is all about.
If you did, you would seek reconciliation with that friend who has done you evil in one way or the other and shows that person grace by understanding that the person or friend who hurt you is human, too capable of making mistakes.
5. Don’t Give Up.
Last but not least, don’t give up on your friendship just because someone has hurt you; continue to love them despite their offense. Your love must be sincere and from a pure heart” (1 Peter 1:22-23). Only then will you not give up on your friendship because of a simple offense.
However, if you choose to give up on your friendship just because the person you were friends with hurt you through betrayal or other means, it shows that your love for that person you were friends with is not sincere and superficial in nature.
In fact, one of the litmus tests that will show that you are a true friend with the love of Christ in you is that you will easily let go and forgive your friend who hurt you by not abandoning or giving up on your friendship too soon.
Sadly, most people including so-called believers will easily give up and stop talking to you when you just offend them even in the slightest manner, which is sad indeed.
How many friendships do you know that have gone down the drain you thought were strong and unbreakable but fell apart just because of a simple offense or misunderstanding? All the falling out was because someone gave up too soon on the friendship instead of resolving things.
I hope the above post on when Christian friends hurt you and what to do about it will now help you on how to effectively deal with Christian friends who have done you wrong in the past. In closing, if this post was helpful to you, let me know in the comments below, and don’t forget to share before you leave. Peace.
- How Does God Handle Those Who Hurt Us? [+ Sermon].
- If God Loves Us Why Do We Suffer? [+Sermon].
- Does God Punish Those Who Hurt You?
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