Have you recently entered courtship and are wondering what questions to ask your partner during Christian courtship before entering marriage?
If you are such a person, then this divinely inspired post is for you which will help you with the important questions you must ask your partner during courtship as you prepare for marriage.
The 10 Christian courtship questions below will help you know if you are a good fit for each other in marriage or not so that you don’t waste each other’s valuable time. Let’s get started.
10 Vital Courtship Questions To Not Ignore.
- Finances.
- Children.
- Your Deal Breakers.
- Physical Intimacy.
- Marital Expectations.
- What Love Means To You.
- Future Career Plans.
- Where You Want To Live.
- The Church You Both Want To Attend.
- Issue Of Divorce And Remarriage.
1. Finances.
Questions relating to finances such as spending habits and how you both plan to manage your finances when you get are one of the vital questions you must ask each other early on in courtship.
Doing so will help each of you understand each other’s philosophy and approach to finances to determine if you are both financially compatible with each other.
Since finances are one of the top things marriage couples argue about in marriage, it’s imperative you know each other’s financial spending habits so that you are on the same page as you enter marriage.
2. Children.
The issues of having children and how many children you both desire to have once you tie the knot in holy matrimony must be discussed beforehand to avoid future disagreements in this area.
For example, you may discover you want a certain number of children while your partner is of a different view. In this situation, you need to have honest conversations about the matter and come to a compromise.
Conversely, you may discover your partner isn’t interested in having children at all while you desire children and starting a family. If you can’t agree on such a vital topic, then, it’s better to part ways for the best of both.
3. Your Deal Breakers.
Another important question you must ask each other as you court each other is what your relationship deal breakers are that will make you end the relationship altogether.
This question of relationship deal breakers is vital as it will help both of you understand what you can tolerate from each other and what the red line that must not be crossed is.
For example, you may find alcohol, abuse of any kind, disrespect, etc. as relationship deal breakers for you. If so, be clear to your partner that you won’t tolerate such unhealthy behaviors from them.
Check: 11 Crucial Deal Breakers That Ruin Godly Relationships.
4. Physical Intimacy.
The question of how you view sexual intimacy, how many times you want it weekly, and what it means to you must be discussed early on in courtship.
Sexual intimacy is a vital component in marriage as it bonds both spouses close together, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. It’s why 1 Corinthians 7:5 tells spouses not to deprive each other sexually.
Asking these sensitive questions that most Christian couples avoid will help you avoid future problems in this area as you will know if you are sexually compatible or not. If not, you are simply not a good fit for each other.
Make it clear to your partner that you are courting from the onset how sexual intimacy is vital to you and the number of times you desire it weekly.
5. Marital Expectations.
Yes, the question of your expectations in marriage is something you must not shy away from if you don’t want future problems.
This is especially true when it comes to things like doing chores, gender roles, raising children, and other responsibilities that come with marriage.
As a godly man soon-to-be husband, make it clear to the sister you are dating what you expect of her and what being a godly wife means to you individually.
Conversely, as a young single Christian woman looking forward to being a Christian wife in a godly marriage, make it clear to the brother you are courting what you expect of him as a godly husband when you marry him.
6. What Love Means To You.
What true love is to you and how you want to be loved is another vital question you must ask during your courtship journey after transitioning from dating.
Since we are all different as humans, it therefore follows we also want to be loved differently and in a certain way. This is where your love language comes in.
While courting, make it clear to your future life partner what your love languages are. Doing so will help you know if you are love-compatible. Yes, there is such a thing as love compatibility in case you didn’t know.
I can’t imagine marrying someone who can’t speak my love language. Otherwise, “What am I trying to achieve in life?” You will never feel loved in marriage if you marry a person who can’t speak your love language.
7. Future Career Plans.
Questions concerning your future career plans must also not be ignored if you are still in a godly relationship as your courtship journey progresses.
For example, you must be clear to your partner how marriage will affect your career. For example, if you want your partner to stay home and raise the kids, that must be discussed.
If you are a Christian woman, make it clear to the man you are dating if you want to be a stay-at-home mom or not. It will be unfair to you as a lady for the man to expect you to stay home when you didn’t discuss it beforehand.
8. Where You Want To Live.
Where you want to live after getting married is something you must also discuss as a couple and come to an agreement with. Perhaps, you may want to move to a different city or country.
If that’s the case, discuss this topic of where you want to settle down together so that you can both decide where you both want to live which will be a win-win for both of you.
Otherwise, if you have not discussed where you want to live, that can be a problem in your future marriage especially if your spouse chooses to move and live in a place you both didn’t agree to.
9. The Church You Both Want To Attend.
The question of which church you both want you and your future children to go to when you get married is another question that you must not sweep under the rug, though you practice the same faith.
This is especially true if both of you while in courtship still attend different denominations. As you know, different denominations have different doctrines and teachings concerning the bible.
You may find that you may not agree with certain doctrines and teachings from the church your partner attends.
If that’s the case, you need to discuss these issues and agree early on which church you both be attending after getting married.
10. Issue Of Divorce And Remarriage.
Last but not least, the question of how you view divorce and remarriage as a Christian is another vital question you can’t ignore while in courtship as it has profound implications.
If you are a Christian who’s serious about making heaven in the end, you must understand that a Christian marriage is for life and only death ends the marital covenant.
It’s so sad to see many so-called Christians getting divorced and remarrying while their convenient spouse is still alive. Jesus Christ said in Luke 16:18 that anyone who does that is living in continuous adultery.
Make it clear to your potential future husband or wife that divorce is not an option. This is the stance on marriage you’ll have if you are truly saved. Never mind those who think otherwise as salvation is personal.
Check: The Harsh Truth About Divorce And Remarriage According To Jesus.
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Conclusion.
I hope the above 10 Christian courtship questions will help you ask the right questions to help you determine whether the person you are dating or courting is a good fit for you or not.
Many Christians end up with the wrong life partner they can’t relate to because they didn’t ask the right questions while in courtship. May that not be you.
In closing, if this post has edified you, comment below, and don’t forget to share as you leave using the share icon to your right. God bless.
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